We have a spunky and expressive kid. Sometimes words don’t quite come out right. I get a lot of furrowed eyebrow expressions, the kind that beg “what?!”

Recently, at my company picnic, we marveled at all of the abundantly filled coolers, and then turned our attention to our tottering 1 year old.

“Um, we have kid drinks, you know.” I heard a voice behind me. I nodded in appreciation, “got it, thanks!”

“But your kid is walking around with a wine cooler.”
Sure enough, our daughter had helped herself and was proudly sharing, “I picked the pretty pink one!”

A couple of hours later, we did a potty run. The outdoor picnic area has a beautiful, fully plumbed building.

While waiting in line, my daughter gushed loudly and admiringly, “Oh, Mommy, this potty looks like a bar!”

A woman who I had never met shot me a concerned look, one that scolded and secretly asked “just what do you do with that child?!” Had she seen the wine cooler incident earlier?

“How do you know what a bar looks like?” I asked timidly…keeping my cool through a sudden wave of self-doubt, with an audience, no less.

“You know, a bar, where animals live on a farm?!”

I took a deep breath and admired the architecture of the bathroom. The only associations my child was having was with Old McDonald.

Later, during drop off at school, I overheard her telling her teacher: “my mommy has two TVs at work, (she means computer monitors), she has a picture of me on one, (screen saver) and she looks at me and the other at work all day. She watches a lot of TV at work.” (Oh, is that what I do?:))

Here is my favorite: while running errands, she randomly asked: “Mommy, someday when I am really tall, I will be able to reach Kevin, right?” (WHO IN THE WORLD IS KEVIN?) My protective instincts kicked in. I asked several times who Kevin was. Each time, she grew more and more frustrated with me. Finally, with a deep sigh, she replied, “Mom, you’re the one that told me about it, you know, Kevin, where God lives?”

Thereby, important tidbits upon viewing life at 4: choose what is pretty and pink, appreciate the beauty of the “barn,” work full time watching TV, and dream of the tomorrow when you can reach Heaven.

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